doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Mom said you looked used
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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