we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
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