ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
