It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
