Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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