we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Randomize
