When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
