ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
