Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
