Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Randomize
