apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
He? As in you personified your dick?
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
