But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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