No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
