So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Randomize
