jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Randomize
