watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Randomize
