I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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