That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
