was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Randomize
