We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize