who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
