Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Randomize
