all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
i dont even know how to be here
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Randomize
