Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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