I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
