so explain again why im purple
no
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
