just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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