I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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