Got a toothbrush?
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
