I can't breathe out the right side of my face
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
