No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
love makes seman taste better
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
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