you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
