I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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