I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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