Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
