please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
