the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
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