i'm signing you up for texting rehab
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
