She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
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