I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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