dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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