Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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