Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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