No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
