Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
