found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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