I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
