Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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