I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Randomize
