I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
